January 18, 2012

THE MOST AMAZING TUMBLR POST OF ALL TIME.

(Source: marathonpacks)

January 11, 2012
dadsaretheoriginalhipster:

Your dad wasn’t a law abiding citizen before you weren’t and he’s got the roadie-beer drinking skills to prove it. He was a man-wolf that howled at the moon, pissed wildly into the wind of life and followed his own testosterlaws of how to govern his life. He lived at 110 mph in a 55 mph speed limit world.  He’s already done everything he tells you not to do and knows that you shouldn’t do it because you’re not whiskey-tough enough to survive it like he did. 
So hipsters, next time you’re swiping free drinks from the bar or PBR piss drunk riding your fixie across the city while dodging a *BUI and blasting through stop signs, remember this…
You have your dad to thank for how strict the law has become because the government passed those rules in hopes that it would control the fun-hurricane that he was. 
(Dads are the Original Hipsters doesn’t condone drunk driving and shit was different back then.  Drunk fixie riding is acceptable because you’ll most likely only hurt yourself, so wear more than a cycling cap, wear a helmet.)
*BUI - Biking Under the Influence - yes it’s a real thing. 
Thanks to Jane for today’s photo

dadsaretheoriginalhipster:

Your dad wasn’t a law abiding citizen before you weren’t and he’s got the roadie-beer drinking skills to prove it. He was a man-wolf that howled at the moon, pissed wildly into the wind of life and followed his own testosterlaws of how to govern his life. He lived at 110 mph in a 55 mph speed limit world.  He’s already done everything he tells you not to do and knows that you shouldn’t do it because you’re not whiskey-tough enough to survive it like he did. 

So hipsters, next time you’re swiping free drinks from the bar or PBR piss drunk riding your fixie across the city while dodging a *BUI and blasting through stop signs, remember this…

You have your dad to thank for how strict the law has become because the government passed those rules in hopes that it would control the fun-hurricane that he was. 

(Dads are the Original Hipsters doesn’t condone drunk driving and shit was different back then.  Drunk fixie riding is acceptable because you’ll most likely only hurt yourself, so wear more than a cycling cap, wear a helmet.)

*BUI - Biking Under the Influence - yes it’s a real thing. 

Thanks to Jane for today’s photo

January 5, 2012
Dear Dennis, The man who might have written on this card once controlled Europe—three short years ago when you were born. Today he is dead, his memory despised, his country in ruins. He had a thirst for power, a low opinion of man as an individual, and a fear of intellectual honesty. He was a force for evil in the world. His passing, his defeat—a boon to mankind. But thousands died that it might be so. The price for ridding society of bad is always high. Love, Daddy

December 23, 2011
dallasclayton:

 
GROWN
It‘s a dismal daythat daywhen your parents decidebecause of books they’ve readand teacher’s they’ve talked tothat you are too oldto keep taking baths with your friends. No more bubblessplashingplaying pretend submarines.Only washing yourself clean and thorough.It’s a hopeful daythe day that followsas you set out lookingto make new friendsthe kind who will not carewhat their parents thinkand many years laterwill wander with youarm in armin search of larger bathtubsand neverending bubbles.

dallasclayton:

GROWN

It‘s a dismal day
that day
when your parents decide
because of books they’ve read
and teacher’s they’ve talked to
that you are too old
to keep taking baths with your friends.
 
No more bubbles
splashing
playing pretend submarines.
Only washing yourself clean and thorough.

It’s a hopeful day
the day that follows
as you set out looking
to make new friends
the kind who will not care
what their parents think
and many years later
will wander with you
arm in arm
in search of larger bathtubs
and neverending bubbles.

(via dallasclayton-deactivated201304)

December 22, 2011
You’re old enough for the whole truth: Santa didn’t die immediately. Even though the second bullet pierced his lung, it missed his belly that shook when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly, and the coroner believes he could have pulled through if the gunshots hadn’t spooked his reindeer, who trampled him to death. Rudolf’s nose wasn’t the only thing disturbingly red that night.

December 14, 2011
What you see before you is my last meal of true non-fatherhood, captured by Grant Manship the evening before Christy went into labor. It consists of: kale salad, cashews, apricots, Doritos (original flavor) and wine.

What you see before you is my last meal of true non-fatherhood, captured by Grant Manship the evening before Christy went into labor. It consists of: kale salad, cashews, apricots, Doritos (original flavor) and wine.

12:09pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZhKIrxDFYlKN
  
Filed under: hashtag 
December 8, 2011

December 6, 2011

15 minutes cashed in at 3 months. Sorry, dude.

December 5, 2011
Simon the Cat has lived his life in the shadow of Miguel for the last three months. It’s nice to see him get some propers from The War on Drugs today at SPIN.

Simon the Cat has lived his life in the shadow of Miguel for the last three months. It’s nice to see him get some propers from The War on Drugs today at SPIN.

December 2, 2011

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